prince of tennis characters are stupid
by absoluteaoki
Summary: I just love them all… This is the story of our prince of tennis characters when off screen… Are they really that idiot? No comment… just read this one… Totally crazy paranoid tennis players… ATTENTION: NooooooooooooT yaoi………
1. rikkaidai's dayoff?

I just love them all…

This is the story of our prince of tennis characters when off screen…

Are they really that idiot??

No comment… just read this one…

Totally crazy paranoid tennis players…

ATTENTION: NooooooooooooT yaoi………

STORY ONE:

RIKKAIDAIS' DAY OFF?

It's a busy day for Rikkai tennis club… busy practicing!!(They're always busy doing that because of their fukubuchou SANADA GENICHIROU…what a creepy man.)

But it doesn't mean that they are really that serious during practice. (Because some of them are actually PARANOIDS.)

Sanada, Yanagi and Yukimura-buchou are discussing about their new formulated practice menu. Akaya is having a practice game with Yagyuu. Niou and Marui are having their warm-up exercise and Jackal is sitting on the bench since he had finished doing warm-up stuff.

Marui: so BORING!! BORING BORING BORING!!

Niou: SHUT UP BUNTA!! I'M CONCENTRATING!! DAMN IT!!

Marui: really?? How unusual… rat haired FREAK!!

Niou: what the fck did you say!!

Marui: I SAID I'M HANDSOME AND YOUR'E UGLY…

Niou: hey… looks who's talking!!

Marui: ugly…

Niou: same to you….

Jackal: (sweat drop) here we go again….

Akaya: both of you are ugly……

Niou and Marui: you're 100 percent more ugly than us……

Akaya: THAT'S NOT TRUE! My mom told me that I'm handsome.

Niou: your mom is a liar.. You're so ugly that even frogs will vomit a …. Umm…

Marui: bubblegum

Niou: yeah right bubblegum when they see you… hey!! Why bubblegum?? Frogs don't vomit bubblegum…

Marui: and why??

Niou: BAKA!! Because frogs don't eat bubblegum…

Marui: bubblegum is being chewed not eaten… chewed and eaten are different you know…

Niou: I know that damn it!!

Akaya: I'm handsome you know… right YAGYUU SEMPAI?

Yagyuu: (looking so annoyed) I don't know…

The three bakemonos heard the shouting of the idiots. And Sanada got pissed off…

Sanada: you three, 50 LAPS AROUND THE COURT!!

Niou: puri… ugly…

Sanada: what did you say? Huh.?

Niou: I said you're an angel… an ugly angel!! UGLY!!

Akaya/Marui: ( laughing ) hahaha…. Ugly angel………

While doing their assigned laps, the three idiots keep on chanting…

"UGLY ANGEL UGLY ANGEL… WHO'S THE UGLY ANGEL??

IT'S FUKUBUCHOU…" then they laugh..

As usual, Yukimura smiles, Yanagi says no comment, Yagyuu and Jackal sweat dropped and Sanada, well, he's ugly… I mean angry… gosh…

End of the rikkai whatsoever.. Hope you all enjoy reading the first part!!

Next: HYOTEI!! KATSU NO WA ATOBE!!


	2. katsu no waatobe?

Second part…

Hyotei players are stupid..

CHAPTER TWO:

HYOTEI… KATSU NO WA ATOBE

"Hyotei.. Hyotei…Hyotei…

_What's with HYOTEI?_

_There are paranoid tennis players _

_And a super freaky nerd coach…itteyoshi…"_

After the practice, the regulars of hyotei went to their locker room… and it seems that Gakuto has something to say about their ever annoying buchou, Atobe.

Gakuto: I've discovered something about Atobe!!

Oshitari: just stop it Gakuto!

Shishido: another nonsense stuff..huh?

Gakuto: this is so fishy you know…

Ootori: what is it, Mukahi-san?

Gakuto: ATOBE PISS!!

Shishido: what now if he urinates?

Gakuto: he piss on his shorts!!haahahahaha…

(everyone except for him sweat dropped)

Hiyoshi: really?

Gakuto: it's not a joke, it's super real…

Oshitari: maybe he's sweating a lot that's why??

Gakuto: and why is it that his shorts has more sweats than his shirt?

Oshitari: I don't know..

Atobe entered the room…

Atobe: hoi… GAKUTO!! WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT ORE-SAMA?

Gakuto: I just said what I saw..

Atobe: and what is it that you saw?

Gakuto: that you piss on your shorts…

Atobe: huh? Ore-sama? Piss on his shorts? That's ridiculous ! na. kabaji?

Kabaji: usu

Atobe: and what is your proof?

Gakuto: Your short is wet.

Atobe: baka!! Ore-samas' shorts got wet because of you!!

Gakuto: huh? Me? Why?

Atobe: you throw an ice water on ore-samas shorts!!

Gakuto: really? I don't remember that one…

Shishido: so you're the one who's responsible..

Gakuto: that was great..

Shishido: really? Huh?

Gakuto: someone asked me if your hair is a wig?

Atobe: ore-samas hair is not wig. It's real and beautiful..

Shishido: damn it..

Gakuto: no.. it's wig wig wig wig wig

Atobe got pissed off…

Gakuto: your face also looks like a wig!!

Atobe: that's it!! GAKUTO!! RUN 50 LAPS AROUND THE COURT, NOW!!

Gakuto: hey hey.. Practice is over, right!! Why should I run lapses when practice is over.?

Atobe: because ore-sama told you to do so.. now go…

Gakuto: hai!! Damn you Atobe!!


	3. seigaku's evil lord hime

Hello there

Hello there. This is the third chapter of my crazy story. And now it's SEIGAKU's time of showing off their idiotness. I just hope that Seigaku's fans out there specially my OTAKU FRIENDS will like this one.

There are new faces in Seigaku tennis club, the kind tensai naming Ichinomiya Kantarou, and their new assistant coach… the one and only…

Yuya: Echizen!! 100 laps around the court!!

Echizen: what? Demo I was just fe…

Yuya: 200 laps. And bring that bag of yours…

Echizen: hah!! Demo, this is so he…

Yuya: do you want me to add another 200 laps…

Echizen: I'll run now!!

Poor Echizen, carrying his bags while doing those laps… damn that devil Yuya…

Yuya: hey you! (Calling Echizen) you should finish that within 10 minutes…

Echizen: can you make it 15 minutes?

Yuya: 400 laps…

Echizen: fine! 10 minutes…

Yuya: if you can't do that within 10 minutes, you'll drink the penal-TEA…

Echizen: yayks!! That's not tasty…

On the other part of the tennis court…

Momoshiro: what did you say, mamushi?? (He seems so angry)

Kaidoh: I said you should shut that fucking mouth of yours because your breath causes pollution here…

Inui: mmm… global warming…

Oishi: can you two please give me a break…

Eiji: (he went to Yuya) ne.. Yuya, can I visit you in your house?

Yuya: why?

Eiji: I just want to…

Yuya: (annoyed) dame (no)

Eiji: ehh… why?

Yuya: dame:

Eiji: pls… just once…

Yuya: dame is dame…

Oishi: Yuya, just let us visit you in your house so that we'll be able to meet your parents…

Yuya: definitely dame…

Fuji: well, we can't force Yuya…

Taka: yeah, you're right. You'll just be wasting your saliva…

Tezuka: Yuya, it's time…

Yuya: Everyone gather here…

And everyone went to the court D. Then, she started discussing about the coming national tennis championship. After that…

Yuya: that's all for the day. DISMISSED…

Everyone: arigato gozaimashita

Echizen: what? Why are they…

Yuya: Echizen!! Your ten minutes is over… and you're not done yet!!

Inui: drink this Echizen…

Echizen: why did you dismiss them very early?

Yuya: because their practice is over and yours is not…

Echizen: demo…

Yuya: you came here 10 minutes before the dismissal and not 10 minutes after the practice has started… baka!!

Momoshiro: where were you, anyway?

Echizen: I was assigned to clean the rooftop…

Inui: mmm… detention…

Fuji: you must be enjoying yourself cleaning that's why you forgot about the practice..

Momoshiro: or maybe you were just sleeping in there…

Echizen: that's not true…

Tezuka: Echizen, yudan sezu ni ikou! (Don't let you guard down)

Inui: Echizen, it's time to drink your penal-TEA…

Echizen: YADA!! Momo-sempai!!

Momoshiro: it's your problem, not mine

Echizen: Yuya-chan…

Yuya: 500 laps…

Echizen: I'll drink this one now…

Finish… end of this chapter. I hope you like that one…

Next on the list: THE WORLD OF BAKA

Enjoy minasan…


	4. poems extra

Hi guys. It's been a VERY LOOOONGGG time since my last update of this fanfic. Gomen…. Got so many things to do for the past years… well, enough of my DRAMALOGY (toinks! What's dramalogy?)

Before we proceed to the chapter " The World of Baka", let me share to you some poems made for some of the characters of my fanfic. Enjoy…

**BAKA (Idiot)**

_**Yuya-chan**_

_BAKA… minna are Baka!_

_Baka buchou… Baka fukubuchou!_

_Baka regulars…. Baka non-regulars!_

_Minna are Baka… Kill all the baka!_

Okay. Seigaku's evil lord hime is being evil again. Let's proceed to the next one.

**BUBBLEGUM**

_**Bunta Marui**_

_I love cakes and other sweets,_

_But bubblegum is the best!_

_I always chew bubblegum…._

_Everyday…. Anywhere…_

_During class, during recess, during tennis practice!_

_When I went home, when I go to sleep, when I wake up!_

_During the Kanto tournament, During the Finals_

_My bubblegum is HEALTHY and SWEET!_

_Bubblegum is my best friend…._

Now now, Marui's addiction for bubblegum is…. Over a hundred percent. But, what's with the "when I go to sleep?" well anyway, let's try the next one.

**ORE-SAMA**

_**Atobe Keigo**_

_ORE-SAMA is very beautiful._

_ORE-SAMA is very rich._

_ORE-SAMA is great in tennis._

_ORE-SAMA will defeat Tezuka._

_ORE-SAMA is the one and only KING._

_ORE-SAMAn should be on top._

_ORE-SAMA no bigi ni yoi na!_

(p.s. laughs)

Comment on Atobe's Poem….. sigh…..


	5. The World of Baka

**This is it: THE WORLD OF BAKA.**

**I don't own POT…. Or any of the anime techniques that are mentioned in this fanfic.**

* * *

**Characters: ALL STARS.**

**Setting: Karuizawa training camp.**

**Tezuka:** Minna, DON'T…

**ALL:** YES!

_(Tezuka in depress mode because he was not able to finish his famous and favorite line: don't let your guard down.)_

**Kirihara:** nee, sempai, why are we here?

**Marui:** dunno… ask Sanada.

**Kirihara:** fukubuchou! Why are we here ?

**Sanada:** *_angry_* YOU DON'T KNOW? TARANDOROU! 50 LAPS AROUND THE COURT!

**Kirihara**: eeeehhh! So where's the court?

**Sanada:** Well, that's your problem.

**Kirihara:** eeeehhh! I don't like problems… I hate problems… especially math problems!

**Sanada:** SHUT UP AND DO THE Laps NOW!

_(Akaya went away to do the laps. Poor Akaya. Few seconds after that Atobe went to Sanada to… guess what!)_

**Atobe:** SANADA, I challenge you. ore-sama demands a victory!

**Sanada:** no thanks.

**Atobe**: why? Heh, you scared of my prowess? Huh? Well, I understand on why you won't do have a match against me…. Because you're scared of my brilliant prowess. Right?

_(and then he notice that Sanada's no longer there, AND THE OTHERS HAVE ALREADY WENT INSIDE THE PLACE. AND HE'S LEFT ALONE.. ow, he's not alone… Kabaji is there… )_

**Kabaji:** usu..

**Atobe:** Kabaji, I'm not actually asking you.

**Kabaji:** usu…

_(Atobe sigh)_

_(inside Karuizawa… The coach give them a chance to have a free practice, in other words, they can do all kinds of training that they like. So what are they doing during their free….)_

**Eiji:** KA….ME…..HA…..ME…. HAAAA… _(pose)_

_(practice…)_

**Kintarou:** KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU! _(with hand seals)_

**Momoshirou:** 1 million years of pain _(with tiger hand seal aiming at Echizen's butt)…_

_(WHAT?)_

**Echizen:** MADA MADA DANE! FIREBALL TECHNIQUE!

**Koharu:** BYAKUGAN! (_hiding his eyeballs with white paper_)

**Yuuji: **MANGEKYOU SHARINGAN! (_Having a sore eyes.. eww)_

**Kenya**: Ice Make…. SHIELD!

**Kamio**: BANKAI!

(_SO THIS IS THEIR FREE PRACTICE!)_

**Marui:** heh, you're weak! Too weak! MUGEN….ACTIVATE!

**Yuya-chan**: MOON PRISM POWER….. _(Everybody looks at her_)…DIE YOU SHITHEADS!

…

_(everyone eavesdrop. Yuya chan is being evil again_)

**Davide**: HOACHOOOO!

**Gakuto:** GOMU GOMU! (_punching Shishido_)

**Shishido:** DEATH GLARE (_doing it to Gakuto_)

**Akaya:** KARYUU NO…..

**Sanada:** SHUT UP!

**Niou:** what anime uses the power Shut up?

**Sanada:** you, shut up, Niou!

**Niou**: tsk….

**Tezuka:** what in the world are you doing!

**Shiraishi**: it seems like you've been drugged by ECSTACY….

**Zaizen: **Buchou… your comment is nonsense…

_(Shiraishi is in depress mode)_

**Fuji:** I think everyone is just excited….

**Inui:** data…..

**Yukimura**: Minna… let's not copy the techniques of other anime… we have our own techniques as well…

**Yanagi:** Yukimura …. I don't think that's the point….

**Sanada:** TARANDOROU!

**Yukimura:** ah! Just like Sanada's tarandorou….. it can paralyze the people within its parameter!

_(everyone eavesdrop, including Sanada)_

**Tezuka:** EVERYONE, DON'T….

**ALL:** HAI!

_(Tezuka is in depress mode)_

* * *

YAY! Chapter 4 is done….

Next chapter "Sanada's DAY"

Your comments / reviews is highly appreciated…. XD


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